Thanks for all those things, that you've once did for me.
The gifts, the treat, the services you gave(send me home,etc)

Don't do thing that you will regret.
If you done it, then don't regret.
If you were to regret , than don't do it

Altho we have broken up,but we are friends,
just the usual as, friend + buddy!(:

Kind of regret for meeting him today!
I really really misses him alot, so ya lo,
decided to meet and accompany him for dinner/supper.
I know
I KNOW if I meet him,
I will definitely super can't bear to see him go home =.="
thus I rejected him yesterday for lunch.
sigh, but don't know why today I accompanied him /=
The journey back to my house was so quiet
doesn't seems like the usual us.
I don't know what to say to him either.

He sent me to my lift, I wanted to hug him so badly,
but I paused for a moment, and took the lift up.
Even when I'm in the lift,
I just feel like pressing Level One, and go to the carpark to look for HIM!
just to hug him but...........................
well oh well,
I hesitated :(

Actually,
we been saying about whether to patch back or not.
I kind of very fickle minded.
I don't know what the hell I want
I feel like killing myself=.=
YES!
I do want him,
BUT!
I'm afraid of so many things
such as
If I were to accept him again,
will our relationships still be the same?
will he break my heart again?
will he do the same thing again?
will I still able to trust him, love him?
will I still able to maintain our love in this relationship?
Can he actually gave me the assurance in everything?
A once so easily gave up relationship.

For those people who may know me,may think that I'm a very noisy person.
BUT actually, I'm very shy, very quiet to those that don't know me.
I really don't like to talk to stranger, it just so not me.
I tried to speak up, but I gave up because I really can't do it.
BUT!
sigh!
I know I always go your house have been very quiet.
I am also very akward, you just don't know how I feel.
however,
sometimes you will tell me,
your brother gf , is more socialable , go your house will talk to your family members.
your ex gf is bubbly kind, very sociable with your family members too.
have you ever wonder,
how much all this doesn't seems "fierce" words
had actually hurts me?
even just now when you were to say your brother gf interact more with your family, will ask question and so forth.
This actually causes pains to me, all the hurtings.
To me, is just like some sort of indirectly pressurizing me.
I have NEVER tell you before, because I'm afraid to,

I'm a very very very very DUPER ULTRA sensitive + insecure + low self esteem person.
I always feel that people dislike me, hate me, talk behind my back, I'm ugly, I'm fat, seems as tho the whole world is turning against me and so forth.
&& ya, people do tell me off infront of my face that I'm ugly ever since I'm 5 years old.
and this have build up inside my heart but, I still live happily.
Whenever people say I'm cute or I'm ugly, I will ignore the person.
Because if he/she say I'm cute, deep down I know I'm ugly.
Because if he/she say I'm ugly, I already know I am.

I'm afraid people leaves me. Oh well, people come && people go. It depends on how much the person will stay with you.
&& because of all this little little things that causes me so depressed at times.
but no one ever knows~
I get mood swings easily.
my thoughts always run wild, which causes me into much troubles.

such a relief to be able to say everything out on my blog.
*sigh of relieves*

I really really don't know whether to be with him or no.
The questions I've state, the pressurizing, and others things that I wrote.
I really kept me wonder.
I'm afraid, I will just hurt 2 hearts, instead of just 1.
whenever I feel like to be with him,
&& when I thoughts of the pressure,
I held back.
#sigh

Been dreaming of him every single day, ever since we broke off.

missing you alot, yet held back my answer everytime.
Can you give me the promises && assurance?
perhaps, if you have an answer, then let me know......